Merry Christmas!

Well, if you were, at any point, keeping up with the blog...you probably realized from the last entry that the restaurant DID indeed open and has taken over our lives. It's not a bad thing, but getting it up and running has taken up every second of free time for us a family...so we didn't fall off the face of the Earth, we simply moved into a different section of the Earth where there's no time for blogging - ha, ha!
HOWEVER, things are getting better...more routine...and I expect to start blogging again - atleast once a month - to keep those of you who care:-) up-to-date on what's going on our lives.
It's Christmas morning, and the break from the routine is a very welcome one. It's becoming a rarity for the three of us to be home together at the same time - so we are treasuring our day.
Nicolas had a great Christmas, which, in turn, means Lee and I did, as well. Last night we opened gifts with my family and today we will go to Lee's parents.
We know how truly blessed we are and thank God for each and every day we get to spend together and with each of you - our friends and family!
Merry Christmas!!!
(I'll try to post some Christmas pics in the next couple of days...)

Where's the Beef's?

Glad you asked...it's at 1812 Carondelet, Suite 101...and better yet, it opens MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 29th!!!
For those of you who have no clue what I'm talking about - approximately 21 months ago (I'm referring to it like it's a child...but it kind of is) Lee and started the groundwork for opening a restaurant called Beef'O'Brady's. Finally, nearly 2 years later, we are anticipating the grand opening!
For those of you who have been on this journey with us the whole time, you are probably thinking to yourself, "it's about time!!!" Trust me, we share that thought with you.
It's been a long and tedious process, but our staff started training this week, they are doing a test run today/tonight on community friends of ours (and of our partners, the MacGillivray's) and then Monday - we open the doors "for real". Last night we did a mock run with just the employees and their families - they took turns waiting on/cooking for each other - and it went really well. The food is phenomenal! Our employees are awesome - we're tickled with our "draft picks"! Lee and I came home excited, exhilerated and dead tired:-)
Lee's been at that store 15 hours a day for the last month and between my full-time job and helping him, I've easily kept up with his strenuous work hours. We're exhausted. Thursday, I started getting sick - swollen throat, ear aches, stuffy nose...the works. Yesterday, I barely had a voice left...and today, I'm down to nothing. I can barely whisper. Put me with no voice in a room full of 100 of my closest friends and watch me suffer thru the torture of not being able to communicate!
Nicolas has taken the brunt of all the hours we're putting in, as he gets tossed back and forth between friends and family who are volunteering to help take care of him (thank God for great friends and an awesome family!!!) We're just praying that in the end, it all pays off. We know anything worthwhile takes hard work. And truthfully, we're doing this so we can be more flexible and have more time to spend with him, not less.
For those of you wondering, I have no intentions of quitting my job at the church right now. I'll simply be doing all of the accounting for Beef's and possibly hang out there a night or two each week so Lee can leave. If Beef's turns into something I should be doing full-time, I trust that God will lead me to that decision.
With that, I'd better get busy...huge day ahead of me.
See you at Beef's!

I'm Alive and Well...

Well, even though Nicolas had some pretty strong concerns about my surviving the surgery (which I must say haunted me the whole morning...I was a nervous wreck and couldn't stop crying...the nurse thought the IV was hurting and held my hand! They finally gave up on me and knocked me out...) I am alive and well. The surgery went down with no complications - they didn't even have to make the super large incision I was 'promised' to remove the enormous gall stone I had, because when they grabbed onto it, it crumbled. Woohoo... I know lots of you were praying for me and several of you even made your way back to recovery to visit. Of course, my mom and dad and Lee were there. Daniel (pastor and great friend) even somehow snuck back to pre-op and prayed with me before the whole thing got started. That's pretty much when the crying over Nicolas began. Daniel seems to have that effect on me. He's one of those guys that when he looks at you and says..."so, how are you really doing?"...if you are not really doing well...you just can't lie about it to him.
I'm pretty darn sore today and my stomach is black and blue - looks like they took turns kicking me in the gut while I was in the operating room! So, other than achiness and the general crappy feeling you have after surgery, I'm doing really well. I'm trying not to take any pain pills today. I've made it thus far, so we'll see...
My best friend from college, Courtney, sent me a package on Tues (day before surgery) with some cashew turtles from Cape May, NJ to speed up my recovery:-) I've also had my mom doting over me with mashed potatoes and gravy from KFC, my husband bringing me ice cream from Sonic, and my friend, Ashley, bringing me Andy's butter pecan custard concrete...yummmmm!!! One of my 'ya-ya's' (you know, the sisterhood...), Pam, even came over and sat with me last night while Lee took Nicolas to his soccer game. (which they won 6-0; no ties during that game!!!)
I've also had multiple caring phone calls, text messages and e-mails...so I'm totally feeling loved! Thanks friends and family...I'd be so lonely without each of you in my life...

It's today...it's today...

Only with not quite the same enthusiasm as my last post of the same title. In about 15 minutes, I'll be leaving for the hospital to have the ever painful gall bladder removed from my body. Until last night, I was actually pretty excited about this, as it has been causing me so much pain, I'm just ready to get rid of it.
Last night, however, we decided that we should tell Nicolas that I was having the surgery. I'm not expecting anything to go wrong, but just in case it does, I would hate for him to come home from school unaware that there was ever anything going on to begin with. He just thought I was going to the doctor.
So, in VERY simple terms, we explained that I was going in for surgery, they would cut my belly, take out the gall bladder, sew it back up and by the time he gets home from school I should be resting on the couch.
Out of literally nowhere...he says..."you might die!" And the waterworks began.
Now I know I've discussed with a few of my closest friends that surgery is surgery and I'm fully aware of the fact that sometimes things go wrong...but NOT with my 5-year old!
He was completely distraught over it for the rest of the evening and I rocked him to sleep with him asking me to please ask the doctor to not kill me...he doesn't want a new mommy...
Gut wrenching.
So, for any of you out there reading this...if, God forbid, something should go wrong this morning, please make sure that Nicolas knows that his mommy loves him and his daddy more than life itself. In time, he may also want to know that his mommy loves Jesus and knows without a doubt that he died on a cross just for her and that when she dies, whenever that is, she will be living with him for eternity and watching Nicolas grow into a respectable young man, who will love and honor Jesus in all that he does (my prayer), from the vast heavens...

My oh my, how time flies...

I can't believe it has been over a week since I've posted...it seems like I've had multiple times that something has happened over the past week that I've said, "I've gotta put that on the blog." Obviously, that didn't happen, so now you may never know the important inner workings of my mind...
I can say that since my last blog entry, my gall bladder surgery has been scheduled. I'll be going under the knife next Wednesday, Sept 10th at 8am at Southeast. I can't wait. I've had more trouble these past few weeks than I've had the past few months. I'm totally ready to get rid of that thing. I'm hoping it weighs about 40lbs and I wake up a new skinny person. (I've asked about that possibility and it likely weighs about 8oz...not exactly what I had in mind)
Nicolas is still doing awesome and absolutely loves school. I'm doing much better and am getting accustomed to the fact that he not only doesn't want me to walk him to his class, he would prefer that I not even be seen by his fellow schoolmates. He wants to practically jump out of the car while it's still moving...and doesn't even want me to pull into the parking lot. (Mom and Dad...if you're reading this...DON'T WORRY...I do atleast pull in the parking lot:-)
He is becoming such the little grown up. He got to check out his very own library book, already had his school pictures made and has a new best friend, Tanner, who is also on his soccer team.
His first official soccer game was Tuesday night and although the score was clearly 3-1, Nicolas said that "Coach said it was a tie..." Since we weren't the "3", I decided not to burst his bubble!
Next week, I'll be laying around relaxing post surgery, so I'm sure I'll have plenty of time to update the blog.
Oh...and how about that Sarah Palin...I absolutely LOVE her...what a little spitfire...reminds me of someone I know...I think we would be great friends...

Bye-bye love...bye-bye gallbladder...

After being "diagnosed" by no less than ten people as having a problem with my gall bladder...I decided to actually go to the doctor. I had 4 incidents, or 'attacks', if you will, prior to actually going and getting it checked out. The first one was in April and then it didn't happen again until June when we were in Mexico. So, there was so much time in between, I forgot I had a problem (OK - maybe I didn't forget...maybe I chose to forget). But these last two attacks happened within a week from each other, and seeing as how I'm not a big fan of pain, I thought I'd get it checked out.
Friday I had an ultrasound, which revealed that I have a 3cm gallstone, which apparently in the world of gallstones, is quite large. The doctor is very direct, to say the least (which melds well with my personality), and pretty much said..."you can wait until you have another attack and head to the ER, or you can go ahead and schedule a surgery and have your gall bladder removed. Either way...its' coming out."
SOOO...I scheduled an appointment with a surgeon on Sept 9th. Provided I don't have an attack prior to that appointment, I'll be having my gall bladder removed sometime after that.
My big question was..."How will having my gall bladder removed affect me? What changes?"
The answer..."Nothing really...you don't need it anyways."
So I just have to wonder...why do I have the goofy thing in the first place? What a lot of pain and hassle for something that I don't even need.

All is well...

Well we have completed the first full week of school and all is well. Nicolas seems to love it...I seem to be over it...and I've heard from the principal that he's the best kindergartner ever (of course, she's my friend...so take that for what it's worth:-)
Soccer is getting ready to start up - I posted some pics to the right of his first practice. It was rather shocking to me how short Nicolas is compared to all of the other kids. It's the "kindergarten" league, so all of the kids should be close to the same age as him, but all of them (even the girl) are taller than he is. I know he doesn't have alot going for him (I'm 5'3" on a good day; Lee is 5'9"), I mean, it's no secret the kid's probably not going to be an NBA star...but we'll keep holding out hope. There's always that adolescent growth spurt...

That Kid is Mine...

Well, Lee and I determined that the only logical explanation for the overwhelming mood swings that take place in Nicolas from day to day, hour to hour, and sometimes minute to minute can only be explained by the sheer fact that he is indeed, my child.
It's absurd, really. Yesterday he had the complete meltdown (see yesterday's blog) and last night, the meltdown continued. I had worship team rehearsal last night and the poor child literally flung himself on me to try to get me to stay home or take him with me. Very needy, to say the least.
This morning, however, he woke up all smiles, ate, got dressed, brushed his teeth and then INSISTED that I drop him off in the "car line" - NOT walk him inside to his classroom. "Mom," he says, "it's been a week, I know where the room is."
I guess deep down, there's this demented part of me that in some way enjoyed the little meltdown yesterday. That part of me that wants him to need me, wants him to want to spend time with me, wants him to beg me to stay home with him. The same part that is scared to death of him getting out of my car and walking to his classroom by himself, even if I'm pulled right up to the front door of the school.
In any case, it's clear to all involved that he is definitely a mere product of his environment. With all of his crazy mood swings, which do nothing but enhance my own mood swings, it's hard to determine who needs to be on prozac more...

The First Meltdown...

Well, I think we could classify today as Nicolas' first school related "meltdown". It started before we left the house and pretty much continued until we reached the classroom. NOT because he didn't want to go to school, mind you. But because he has discovered something very quickly in his 3 short days of school...he is one of the few students in his class that's mommy has to work and can't pick him up from school every day. Very traumatic for him...which turns out to be traumatic for me, as well. He started with the simple, "Mommy, can you please pick me up from school today?"...which quickly escalated into a full blown..."YOU'RE A MEAN, MEAN MOMMY! I'm the ONLY kid who's mom doesn't pick him up from school. ALL the other kids get to go home after school. I'm the ONLY one who has to go to daycare!"
Now, clearly I know that his claims are untrue - he is not the only child that goes to daycare after school (I actually asked today and found that there are five children that ride the bus to Nicolas' daycare). But, in his mind, five isn't alot. And it clearly appears to him that I am the only mom mean enough to force him to suffer thru childcare after an exhausting day at school.
"Why don't you WANT to pick me up and hang out with me?" he asks.
Wow. Now there's a nice kick in the gut. Of course I WANT to pick him up from school. Not only that, I want to take him, pick him up, and volunteer (stalk him) at the school several hours every day. I look at him and him asking me why I don't want to hang out with him and I see a teenager, who 10 years from now will be begging me to PLEASE leave him alone! And I think to myself how quickly this stage will pass and how I'm not able to fully enjoy it with him...and wondering if someday he'll magically "get it".
In my normal parenting style, I tried to have a completely adult conversation with him explaining that "Mommy works so that she and Daddy can buy you things like DS games and take you places like Six Flags and Disney World and let you enjoy your favorite foods (McDonald's:-) from time to time without having to worry about where the money will come from - things alot of kids never get to experience."
To which he replies, "I don't care if I never get another toy or ever go anywhere again, I just want you to pick me up from school!"
Again, not true. But where do you go from there?
I can tell you where I went...to work. I left him in a classroom with tears in his eyes, reminded him to get on the daycare bus after school, and left to go make money so I can buy him things he doesn't want, take him places he doesn't want to go and pay someone else to pick him up from school every day.

First Week is Over...

We (OK...I) have survived the first 'week' of school even if it was only 2 days. Nicolas seems completely unscathed and other than the fact my entire face was swollen today from all the crying I did yesterday, I came out unharmed as well.
I can't say he loves it, because he truly seems indifferent. After school, he rides the Small World (his pre-school) bus back to the same place he's been going for the past 2 years, so he still has a lot of regularity in his schedule. He just hasn't missed a beat. He won't tell me what he does at school...he's too grown up to talk to me, I guess. Or maybe he's just a little annoyed because I started asking questions the minute we picked him up and was trying to keep him awake so I could keep asking them even after bed time!
I asked him last night if he liked it enough to go back...or did he just want to keep going to pre-school and he gave me this look like I was completely stupid and was like..."MOM...I'm GOING to school, leave me alone, I'm almost in 1st grade!!!"
Wow, this school thing is flying by a lot faster than I anticipated...

It's today...it's today!

"Is it today, Mom...is it today?!"
"It's always today, George...always today." Stuart Little

Well, it really is today. This morning I took my very small, young child to an enourmous building with thousands (OK, maybe hundreds) of kids running around...and just left him there. He is in a classroom with 27 other kindergartners...most all of whom seemed to share his total "I couldn't care less that you're leaving me" attitude. Ouch!
Lee did see one child crying, which I decided had to be worse than the kid not caring...so I've got that going for me.
I thought, for the most part, the morning went well. Nicolas was pretty excited until we got in the room, when he started holding my hand. When I asked him if he remembered is SS# (so he can punch it in to get lunch), I thought I detected a slight quiver in his voice. Still, I held it together pretty nicely until I walked out of the classroom and saw all of the weeping/mourning going on in the hall...then I pretty much lost it.
I know lots of people that work at the school, so several of them found me and hugged me and asked how I was doing...which of course, made me start crying even though I thought I had already gotten my act together prior to their asking.
Lee, not having a clue how to handle me because he sees absolutely no reason to be concerned or upset, took me to eat breakfast, and after realizing that I wasn't going to "move on" quite that easily, decided to go do some work and leave me alone. I've already driven by the school to see if I could see him outside at recess...no such luck.
I'm heading over to a Kindergarten Mom's party in a few minutes in hopes that there will be someone there in worse shape than I am. Misery loves company. Maybe taking the day off work wasn't the wisest of ideas...

Kindergarten...

Well, I just happened to remember the blog due to some recent unfortunate events that have caused me to read other people's blogs...anyway, the importance of creating a traceable history, especially for Nicolas, has a newfound importance to me. So, seriously, I'm going to try to blog atleast once a month, which could possibly turn into more, as I do typically get addicted to stuff like this once I learn what I'm doing:-)
I read my last posting and find it quite humorous that nearly a year ago, I already knew what I would be feeling like this week. That's right. This is the week. In two very short days, Nicolas starts kindergarten.
I'm excited for him, because he is OH SO excited, so I can't help but enjoy it a bit. But, I'm sick with the realization that he is growing up. In fact, he doesn't seem the least bit concerned about going to school and will probably be embarrassed to kiss me goodbye as he runs from the car when I drop him off. I could cry just typing about it.
I say out loud that I worry about taking him to this place where he can so easily be lost (I mean, if he has to go to the bathroom, is someone going to follow him in there???) and overlooked. But, I think the true fear is just that...he doesn't so much need me anymore. I know, I know...he's only five. He needs me. He can't drive himself to his soccer games or cook his own meals...but if you have a child that has ventured out into the big new world of kindergarten, I suspect you know what I'm talking about here.
Well, enough about that. I've gotten myself all worked up again...all I can do at this point is promise to blog again when this drama has subsided:-)